I Died That Day

2005-09-12 11:12:00 +0000

Today as I was working at the Help Desk I put an infected computer on the network.

Thatʼs bad.

It was my job to sponge the thing of all spyware and viruses, and I thought I did, but something slipped past me. I left a little virus on the machine. It wasnʼt even particularly nasty; I just forget to run one of our removal tools.

I plugged the network cable into the computer, and almost immediately the normal lights went out and red lights started flashing everywhere, and there were sirens and klaxons and high-pitched whine sounds, as if Capt. Picard had just yelled, “Battle stations!” Then the full-time guy started barking out, “Pull the ethernet cables! Pull them all!” Everyone else in the room started yanking network cables out of the backs of laptops all at once, and I disconnected mine, too. The full-time guy approached the wall and punched a code into a keypad, and the sirens shut off and the lights returned to normal.

Okay, not really.

I plugged the network cable into the computer, updated Windows and all the antispyware and antivirus software, shut down the computer, marked the machine as “done” in the database, and put it on the “Done” shelf. Twenty minutes later a man I had never seen before walked into the room with a piece of paper in his hand, announced that there was an infected computer on the network, and gave us the MAC address for the machine. (Ask me later what a MAC address is.) We checked the computers that were currently on the network, but none of them matched the MAC address. I checked the last machine I had worked on, and the address matched. I owned up that it was all my fault, and everyone was nice and forgiving, and “everyone makes mistakes,” etc. But I died.

I felt bad. But now Iʼm better, because Family Home Evening is going to be at my house tonight! Gonna have a good time tonight! Gonna have a good time tonight!