Subtle Coolness · chrono index · alpha index

Rock But Not Really

by William Jackson on 2004-05-12

I have been a stone all day. A big fat rock. Sitting and doing nothing. My trusty alarm clock/mobile phone ripped me from sleep at 6:30 as usual. I turned it off and laid back on my bed for a few minutes. Well, I thought it was a few minutes. I got up to look at the clock and was presented with a cheerful “7:31”. Most displeasing. I had 29 minutes to shower, dress, skip breakfast and bike frantically to the Undergraduate Library to be at work on time.

After the shortest shower of my life, I felt so rushed that I put on a t-shirt. A t-shirt! I never feel like myself in a t-shirt. However, if I was forced to wear a t-shirt, the one Iʼm wearing today is the one I would wear. It proudly proclaims “My GPA Sucks” in large block collegiate letters on solid blue.

The last time I wore this shirt, some random guy I passed on campus asked me what my GPA was. I was totally not expecting that, and he probably could tell, because when Iʼm walking toward a fixed destination Iʼm spaced out and concentrating fully on what Iʼm doing. I was probably looking at the ground to make sure I didnʼt trip on a dog or someoneʼs shoe, and his question snapped me back into the real world, and I took about three seconds to think and respond. By this time Iʼm sure the guy was thinking, “You donʼt have to answer, man, I can tell already.”

Yeah. So I told him what my GPA was, and he said, “That doesnʼt suck,” or something to that effect — the details are vague — and I think I said something like, “I know, but I can do better,” and he was gone. What a conversation. Welcome to college life, where your clothing defines your individuality.

I made it to work on time, wheezing and hungry, and sat at a computer for three hours, and went home again. Then I borrowed my friendʼs car and went to H-E-B to pick up a few items and keep the economy running smoothly. I had a list, like I was sent there by my mother, but I didnʼt confine myself to the list. For instance, “5 lb bag of frozen cut brocolli” wasnʼt on the list, but itʼs in my freezer now. Iʼm flexible like that. Now you ladies can tick that box off on the list of things you look for in a guy. Tick off the “prideful” box, too, while youʼve got the list out.

Allow me to continue as if you are fascinated with my day to this point. I got home and put the groceries away, and started making lunch, and about this time Aaron left for studying or exams or whatever, and I had nothing to do. So I examined Aaronʼs DVD collection — didnʼt take long, there are only six DVDs to choose from — and selected “Kids from Shaolin”. It has a different name in China, something like 曼码勃ㄅ弊.

If you can picture it, I was sitting on the floor with a big bowl of rice, eating it with chopsticks, watching a chinese movie that required me to read subtitles. It was A Chinese Experience.

The rice was great and the movie was long, and before I knew it I couldnʼt keep my eyes open, so I did the responsible thing by turning off the movie and trying to take a nap. Only the moment I laid down on my bed, I wasnʼt sleepy anymore. That always happens.