High and Dry

by William Jackson on 2004-06-17

I didnʼt have to be at work until noon today, so I took the liberty of staying out a bit late last night. I do that often. Ask my friends. Anyway, I woke up to my alarm at 10:30 AM and bumbled around my apartment half-awake for a few minutes before stepping into the bathroom, fully prepared to be fully awakened by a fully delicious shower.

This is how I start the shower: Hot water knob one full turn to the right (because itʼs backwards), then turn the “transfer water from faucet to showerhead” knob as far as it will go, then turn the cold water knob one-eighth turn to the left (because itʼs not backwards). Then I give the temperature a minute to stabilize, then I get in.

I really wish that was how it happened this morning. Instead, it was hot water knob one full turn to the right … nothing. No water, not even a drip. I was half asleep and I had work to go to and I felt nasty and dirty and stinky and thereʼs no water.

So I bumble out of the bathroom and into the kitchen to try my luck with the kitchen sink. Iʼm still asleep, because an awake person would know that if the water didnʼt work in the bathroom it wonʼt work in the kitchen. Well, it didnʼt work in the kitchen. I even tried the hot and the cold water just in case. No dice.

I tell my roommate, but I donʼt know how long he has been awake, and heʼs already showered and dressed and all that, so I get shafted because I slept in.

Fortunately, the water was back on at 10:55. Iʼm so lucky.