Not for the Faint of Stomach
by William Jackson on 2004-10-18
If you donated blood today this is what you would see.
I still remember the first time I donated blood. On 4 April 2001 I got into an argument with my girlfriend and I wanted to avoid her. I went to the blood bus for two reasons: I had told her that I really did not like needles and would probably never donate blood; and I knew she wouldnʼt be permitted to donate. Therefore, I decided that the blood bus would be the last place she would look for me. I was right.
Years after this incident, and several months ago, the blood bus was on the campus again. I asked the student assistants about my travels in England, and I was told that I would not be allowed to donate because I had lived there for two years. Today I had two free hours between classes, and I was walking up the South Mall when I saw a big bus and heard someone yelling, “Be a stud, donate blood!” I could not pass up the opportunity to be a stud. This time around, I decided to forego the question asking and just read the literature they had on hand. I discovered that I was allowed to donate, because my trip to England was not before 1996. Lucky me.
I think I heard one nurse tell another nurse that I did the deed in seven minutes or something like that. No one can withstand the fury of Williamʼs blood pressure! The guy that drew my blood was nice enough to give me an arm wrap that matched my shirt, too. I got my complimentary Sprite and cookies and went on my way.
In unrelated news, I discovered a surprise in the candy I purchased this morning. I feel so much more confident about myself when I have SpongeBob SquarePants here to give me support. He helped me through the blood donation process. Yes, that bandage on my finger was from when they tested me for HIV.
Then I was feeling artsy.